Thank you, Jesus!
Posted: 31 January 2010 06:59 AM   [ Ignore ]  
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As I watched the crowning of Miss Virgina as the new Miss America last night, it became evident that her victory was due to the predilections of none other than the the son of God! How do I know? Because as she took her victory walk she looked skyward and said, “Thank you, Jesus!” Apparently the son of God took an active role in determining the outcome of a beauty pageant! This is in stark contrast to his apparent disinterest in preventing the recent Haiti earthquake and the untold suffering that ensued there.

But let’s not be too critical of Jesus. After all, he is in a tough position. I’m sure he can’t intervene in EVERYTHING. And when he does, somebody will be left disappointed (like Miss Hawaii, Miss California, Miss Kentucky, etc.)

Tonight I will watch the Grammy Awards. And I’m sure that Jesus has his favorites here as well. I can’t wait to see who Jesus picks! Oh… and let’s not forget the Superbowl next week! This event (unlike Earthquakes) is too big for Jesus to ignore. I’m sure he’ll be rooting for the ‘Saints.’ But either way, the victorious players will need to acknowledge the son of God’s blessing of their 3rd down play calling.

So congratulations to Miss Virginia. And congratulations to the eventual Grammy Award winners. And to the Superbowl champions. And to every celebrity or athlete that prevails due to the wishes of the son of the creator of the Universe. It’s nice to know that amidst natural disasters, someone recognizes and rewards the unique talents of marketing their hit single, or of kicking a football through a goalpost, or of being considered attractive in a bikini and an evening gown. “THANK YOU, JESUS!”


Ron

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Posted: 08 February 2010 03:19 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 1 ]  
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MrRon - 31 January 2010 11:59 AM

But let’s not be too critical of Jesus.  I’m sure he can’t intervene in EVERYTHING.

 

Not unless he’s omnipotent. Oh, wait…

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Posted: 09 February 2010 12:27 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 2 ]  
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MrRon - 31 January 2010 11:59 AM

Oh… and let’s not forget the Superbowl next week!

I guess a team called the “Saints” was too much for him to pass up.

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Posted: 16 February 2010 12:43 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 3 ]  
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My favorite sport is pugilism.  I love that the victors whom have vanquished the foe by beating holy hell out of them when they give credit to god or jesus.  It’s wonderful to know that the omnipotent take notice and choose sides in such mundane human endevors.

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Posted: 17 February 2010 04:42 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 4 ]  
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Meanwhile the child that is being abused by mom or dad, gets on their knees and begs god to intervene… well… that’s too tragic to even say any more.

The farce of watching people thank jesus after a touchdown or getting an award is just too galling for words, but the original post was brilliant!!!

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Posted: 18 April 2010 05:59 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 5 ]  
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MrRon - 31 January 2010 11:59 AM

As I watched the crowning of Miss Virgina as the new Miss America last night, it became evident that her victory was due to the predilections of none other than the the son of God! How do I know? Because as she took her victory walk she looked skyward and said, “Thank you, Jesus!” Apparently the son of God took an active role in determining the outcome of a beauty pageant! This is in stark contrast to his apparent disinterest in preventing the recent Haiti earthquake and the untold suffering that ensued there.

But let’s not be too critical of Jesus. After all, he is in a tough position. I’m sure he can’t intervene in EVERYTHING. And when he does, somebody will be left disappointed (like Miss Hawaii, Miss California, Miss Kentucky, etc.)

Tonight I will watch the Grammy Awards. And I’m sure that Jesus has his favorites here as well. I can’t wait to see who Jesus picks! Oh… and let’s not forget the Superbowl next week! This event (unlike Earthquakes) is too big for Jesus to ignore. I’m sure he’ll be rooting for the ‘Saints.’ But either way, the victorious players will need to acknowledge the son of God’s blessing of their 3rd down play calling.

So congratulations to Miss Virginia. And congratulations to the eventual Grammy Award winners. And to the Superbowl champions. And to every celebrity or athlete that prevails due to the wishes of the son of the creator of the Universe. It’s nice to know that amidst natural disasters, someone recognizes and rewards the unique talents of marketing their hit single, or of kicking a football through a goalpost, or of being considered attractive in a bikini and an evening gown. “THANK YOU, JESUS!”


Ron

Priceless…

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