We can indeed control what we do, to some extent, but cannot control what we desire. The distortion of a relationship from being tempted by another is enough to send many marriages into a tailspin. They recover mainly through dogged determination, if they recover at all. All this rather than by “loving” and “cherishing” and “honoring”, which I term “woolly abstractions”.
I, for one, do not really see much difference, ownership-wise, between trying to control another’s actions and trying to control their thoughts. This is precisely analogous to the problem religions have with homosexuality. Distortion of affect.
Placing some implied limits on the imagined degree of perfectibility of mankind would, I think be one place to start.
While you have an excellent point, I was criticizing the opposite extreme embodied by Western religious doctrines, the people-must-be-controlled-for-their-own-good mentality. Surely there’s a middle ground.